Posts

Vois sur ton chemin

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Vois sur ton chemin "FEEL AT THE HEART OF THE NIGHT - THE WAVE OF HOPE."  Saturday. Spain's first ever female ecstatic dance DJ is in Hove playing the craziest set I have ever heard in my life. I have been dancing for 3 hours. Intensely. I am so tired. Then a song I forgot ever existed comes on  The song of my childhood "Vois sur ton chemin." I sang the alto part in school (I am a soprano who can go low). The techno remix. Verbal reactions were banned on the dancefloor so I couldn't scream out my specific words of excitement but my body danced like crazy. It gave me the surge I needed and now I am reminded of my childhood The song means "focus on your path." Focus on your path  Focus on your path Get tickets from one side of the board to the other  Get your code live into production  GET YOUR CODE LIVE INTO PRODUCTION  Get users using your code GET USERS USING YOUR CODE It was a mistake to think that I was ever hired for anything else. But it's...

I'm done hiding, now I'm shining, like a butterfly

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I'm done hiding, now I'm shining, like a butterfly  I'm celebrating "Golden" and it's Grammy win. I have a clear plan going forwards My job is to do my tickets  My job is to do my tickets  My job is to do my tickets, and to move them across the board  My job is to move my tickets across the board  and  My job is to GET MY CODE LIVE  MY JOB IS TO GET MY CODE INTO PRODUCTION MY JOB IS TO GET MY CODE INTO PRODUCTION MY TASK IS TO GET MY CODE INTO PRODUCTION MY FOCUS IS TO GET MY CODE INTO PRODUCTION MY TASK IS TO GET MY CODE LIVE  MY FOCUS IS TO GET MY CODE LIVE and  My job is to get users using my code My priority is to get users using my code  My aim is to get users using my code  That is what I am here for  I am here to get users using my code  I am here to get users using my code  That is what I am here to do  I don't have to say yes to anything that does not support this  I am allowed to say no and restric...

After well over 2 years of battling I have found my focus

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After well over 2 years of battling I have found my focus  If you have ever read even so much as one of my blog posts I want you to go out and have a drink on my behalf. I am 10000% serious. This is a breakthrough on this blog. And if you have watched me suffering... then I have suffered a lot. I WILL SAY IT 1000 TIMES. If I have to write 1000 identical blog posts. I will. WHAT IS MY MAIN FOCUS AT WORK Getting tickets from one side of the board to the other  Getting the code I write live  Getting users to use my code I am writing this at 11 pm after a dance workshop. I will write this out 1000 times  I don't care  I know I have this accessibility focus. I know I am learning React. I have the most amazing technical mentor and he has taught me to read the docs When I was 19 I had to battle for months to get an important identification number. When I finally got that thing I wrote it out so many times I COULD NEVER FORGET IT and I still know it perfectly  It m...

What makes a software engineer (at work)?

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What makes a software engineer (at work)? Bro told me to stop worrying so much about what other people think of me. Bro (who is also a very senior Lead and a technical mentor to me, so um maybe not bro, hmm, whoops) told me that I care too much about other people's perceptions of me (that is true) and that that's not what matters  So what does matter at work? Getting tickets from one side of the board to the other  Getting code that you write live  Getting users using your code What could happen if I made these 3 my main focus at work And how could I do that? You see a big part of my work is spreading love  And now I have this cool new accessibility focus as well too  Also want to pay tribute to this crazy new track I have discovered

Thinking in State & State Shape: React (Absolute Disaster - Part 2 can only be better)

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Thinking in State & State Shape: React (Absolute Disaster - Part 2 can only be better)  This is the task for my react time this morning and it's not going well. I've been blocked on it since I knew it was coming. Some cryptic statements from chat gpt include: "State is a model of change - not a mirror of your UI" They say I should be asking myself: "Does this need to change over time?" "Can I calculate this instead?" "What is the simplest shape that still works?" BRO WHAT ARE THESE SHAPES.  WHAT ARE THEY. "This session is decision making, not syntax". BRO TOPIC NUMBER 1: "MULTIPLE USESTATE VERSUS ONE OBJECT" Separate pieces of changes  vs. One bundled piece of change  React doesn't care - I care because it affects mental load apparently and some stuff - bugs and readability  MAKE REACT EASY  "DOES THIS STATE CHANGE TOGETHER OR INDEPENDENTLY?" CHAT GPT STOP TELLING ME WHAT TO DO. IT IS TELLING ME TO TA...

I Can Do So Much Better

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I Can Do So Much Better  I am a slow learner at first. It takes a while for all of the pieces to click together. Once all the pieces come together I move very quickly. I had my last two moments of clicking messed up and this has held me back. I got laid off from one job as I was learning the ropes - and then in my last role it clicked and was going well - but I had to leave because I wanted to come back to the frontend. But once it clicks I move fast  Boy do I move fast  No my issue is around focus. I can work for long periods of time. I can stay deep focused for two hours. But I cannot stop all the crap from stealing my attention  I cannot stop all the crap from stealing my attention I want it to stop stealing it from me. I can do some much better. I came to code. I love to code. How can I protect my attention? How can I realise my unfulfilled potential. I can do so much better than this  I know what I need to do There is only one thing that ever works for me ...

Resting on my Laurels

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Resting on my Laurels In 2023, I gave a talk about my crazy breakthrough into tech.  It was crazy. I gave the talk a year after I had started taking web development seriously - and it had been my job to train to do it for 9 months. It was a great talk. After the talk, the organiser came over to me and said "now it's time to rest on your laurels." Three months later while living my dream and researching AI every day  I got laid off suddenly. It was a horrible time. I got hired into an AI team and that just shows you the magic and miracles of this universe - I manifested way harder than I thought I could've done. But AI was not meant to be for me. I transitioned into something a frontend role - I can process frontend problems 10,000x better than I can do backend ones  a team with more structure - more ceremonies etc. including daily standups - works much better for me as well And I learned frontend from scratch having forgotten everything except the foundations of HTML,...