Susanna Codes

There’ll be no last chance to promise to never mess it up again Everything is fine. I’m at an offsite. I’m just reflecting and quoting a song. The last few weeks have brought about a real breakthrough in my work. It’s actually hard because my offsite has been right by where I used to work with my old team before we all got laid off. I loved them so much. My boys (my all male team). So that has been sad Really sad  Seeing the spots we visited together  Revisiting my old passion and obsession with renewable energy and AI I have made a lot of progress with work in the last few weeks I’m trying to understand what it is Breaking it down into smaller and ever smaller problems Writing a six item to do list for every next day  Blocking things out in my calendar  Making sure those six items are really focused Tickets or react learning or meetings I have everything there was to give to my work Maybe the rewards are still coming  I don’t know  Sometimes I feel like I ...

The stupidest thing I ever did was try and go it alone Bro I have no time. Have to run to work. Going to London tonight. Have to pack final things. Go go go! But I have to say. Although there are circumstances when independence is good  There is nothing stupider than trying to go it alone in life all together. Maybe it’s keeping a big secret. Maybe it’s hoping that something will just go away. Maybe it’s dealing with an issue by yourself Don’t do it Bro as your internet bro I say: don’t do it Don’t go it alone You don’t have to 

The magic at the beginning of a fairytale  At the beginning of a fairytale we know that everything’s about to change. We know it’s going to be tough  But we know things are going to end well for the characters (at least in Disney haha). I feel like I am at the beginning of a fairytale right now I have learned how to work  Now I just need to apply it I have learned how to prioritise and focus efficiently Now I have months ahead of me of applying it I have years ahead of me of applying it But I got there I did so well I did a lot of analysis on my weekends evenings and days off and then a single hour on a cheeky Friday afternoon And I brought it all together  I know I have a lot of work to do as well on a lot of personal stuff  That’s okay I’ve been working on a lot of it a lot of my life But that’s okay too  Like a princess in a story 

Nature: the ultimate neurodivergent sensory soother  Work got me a lava lamp for my new local office. I’ve never been so grateful in my life. I’ve had it for just one day. It was a tough day. By looking at the lava lamp at the end of it and seeing how it calmed me down  I realised that they had made a great investment. They did some other incredible things for me too - I have a set of drawers (my space is tidy for the first time in my life), I have a blanket (self soothing/get cold easily/if I have had a seizure in the last few days and need to rest on a break etc.) I feel really lucky to be supported by this. I have also been supported to do an advanced meditation course As a part of mental wellbeing and growth in my role etc. I have never felt so supported by an employer in my life. I have promised to give a talk to my department when it is done. If you’d like to be invited then give me a shout! Today I went to the beach. It’s a long walk because I live by the port. So to ge...

The Beauty and the Beast When I entered this industry three years ago. I thought it was a level playing field. It is not a level playing field. As a woman you will have to fight harder to get your voice heard and to get taken seriously and even just to have people estimate your technical skills correctly. But I’m not nice. Mistake me as being nice at your peril. I am kind. I am loving. But I am here to work hard. I am here to fulfil my passion and my destiny and my dreams Expect me to shield my brilliance from you At your own risk For I will never ever apologise for being brilliant I will never ever compromise on speaking positively about myself  I will never compromise on loving myself I love myself I will never ever compromise on loving myself For it is only when we love ourselves That we can truly love others Thank you 

Reconnecting with the lands of where I am from  I am from Luxembourg. I am so proud to be from Luxembourg. I am not from the banks and the designer shops although man I do love the airport there. I am from the forests and the villages. I am from the hills and the secret trees. I am from the mountains.  I am from the wind turbines. I am from the secret streams that you would find in the forest. I am from the mysterious pathways in the woods that only I know  I am from the castles that you would have to drive a certain way to find I am from the woods. I am from deep within the woods I am from where the green light of love filters through the trees I am from where you can watch the sunset between two trees while leaning on another tree I am from  I am from  I am from where there are secret white trees in the forest  I do everything I do because I love the environment I love the planet Do you? I love the Earth  I am the Earth  Back home, in Luxembourg...