“The good fight is the one we fight because our heart asks it of us.”

This blog post title quotes Paulo Coelho the Brazilian author. You can’t make this up. When I was 15ish I was in holiday in my dad’s house. In Belgium. It was the time everything was changing. I think I’d had a major life event just weeks before. Looking back it was a time of great change. It was just days before my seizures began.

It’s amazing to look back at how everything changed - if you read my blog post from about two posts back “The greatest gift of all”, you’ll see how I found the real blessing in my seizures.

And so in my dad’s huge huge library which I’m pretty sure he inherited from the last owner - there it was. The Alchemist. I can’t believe how much that book has changed my life. That which you seek is also seeking you. I find it hard to apply this to anything other than God now. And I don’t want to. But that first glimpse into that concept was such a beautify idea. I wanted to be an actress back then.

I often meet actors and I don’t feel as if I have regrets. But what I really want which is also seeking me is AI. I could never shake the desire to be an AI engineer. That which you seek is also seeking you. AI happened for me faster than I could make it happen myself. The speed at which I moved into an AI career is absolutely dazzling. Call it the glory of god. It cannot be anything else. First came software engineering and that was at the speed of light and then came AI engineering. When we do something with the purest intentions the whole world will make it happen for us. It is so beautiful. It is so so so so beautiful. But again.

The only thing to seek is God. Hafiz said “ever since happiness learned from your name, it has been running through the streets trying to find you.” There is a picture called “the light of the world” and it is of Jesus carrying a lantern and the description

Reads: “Will you open when he comes knocking?” But the bible also says (and one of my favourite hymns as well):

“Knock and the door shall be opened unto you.” When will you realise, friend. That the one who is knocking at the door is the one who is being knocked to. Or as I once wrote in a song

“The knocker is the one who is knocked to, 

It’s not you who is seeking me,

It’s I, who am seeking you.” 

But that song is not yet finished. Or it is as Rupert Spira said:

“Every night a different companion, but always the same friend. Why go anywhere when the Beloved always comes to you?” Thank you 

And so in my first year at kraken when I was fighting for my job 24/7 for 10 months and it burnt me out 

And ie as exhausted. It was worth it. Because I thought the good fight. Thank you xxx ❤️🩷🧡💛💚🩵💙💜🖤🩶🤍🤎❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥