I don’t get people, but I do get electronic music

Being autistic in the workplace can be SO

EXHAUSTING. I don’t get the feedback loop I need from most people on whether I have upset them or not (as in most people can usually tell from someone’s facial expressions whether or not they have or haven’t upset them) and unless I know someone really well it’s usually hard for me to tell if I have annoyed them. 

Even then it’s hard to tell. Nb I usually haven’t annoyed most people. But a neurodivergent childhood is very traumatic you often get into trouble and you don’t know why. And so as an adult that can leave me often feeling like I have upset people. And so anyway

After a few days this can pile up and really get exhausting and it usually takes a very regulating incident to bring things back around. Just spare a thought for your autistic colleagues

We are exhausted. Constantly trying to read facial expressions. Especially over video calls.

This is why I like the music of Jon Hopkins. This is where I feel alone, isolated, safe. Of course nobody wants to feel isolated. Everyone wants connection

But just for 5 minutes sometimes

I want to not think about what anybody thinks of me or whether I have upset anybody just by saying something that felt normal to me and might not have felt that way to someone else

Luckily it doesn’t happen too often 

Anyway thanks 

The predictive patterns of electronic music are where I feel most safety 

Are where I feel at home

Thank you 

A 31st birthday “cake” we had last summer