I have no words

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I have no words 

Starting 2026 with my heart broken. 

Nobody orders grief and yet is has to come. The news about switzerland has just been too much. A place so close to home, I have family there, and I grew up as part of an international community - I was surrounded by Italians and French kids and so on all my life. I feel as if I knew these kids. I feel as if I met them.

Those years as well were such formative years for me - the late teens and early twenties. To think that so many young people lost their lives so soon 

Is breaking me apart and tearing me apart 

An angel holding a child - stone culture in a church engraved into a wall

I remember being 18 and I remember my high school friends all of the Italians and French kids that there were at my school (there were no Swiss because it was a European Union school). To think that it could’ve been us and it could’ve been our last night out and it would’ve all ended like that. Why was it them and not us. I don’t know

I am in so many ways areligious and in so many ways pan religious. I tell people I am a Buddhist but I am a Christian too in so many ways. 

So I ask God to rest their souls. I ask Jesus to be with them. 

I’m not big on reincarnation so I won’t wish them luck in their next lives. Although by all means I will do so if they do exist. I just believe in the One living again and again through all of us.

May they live again. And so with a broken heart I commence this beautiful new year. May we all learn and grow and love together. May we all support each other and hold each other. May we feed our own demons so as not to inflict them on the world. May we hold each other a little tighter

This is the hardest blog post in my life I have ever written

I feel as if I have gotten every word wrong 

May we all resolve to love each other a little more 

„I know the sun must set to rise.” - Coldplay

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